Project Runway Junior: S2 E4: "Step it Up From Day to Nightl"

Not long after writing the first review of this PRJR season, I'm about to say something that makes me feel a bit like a hypocrite: I won't be reviewing PRJR anymore this season after this week's episode. It's not that I don't still believe in the quality of this show or in the talent of these young designers because I do. Or well, I guess I believe in the talent more than I do the quality of the show. The challenges are solid, the kids are cool, but I'm currently of the opinion that the producers don't know what the hell they're doing. They don't know how to make an hour long episode that hits all the points it needs to hit, trims all of the fat, and strikes at the heart of what makes Project Runway compelling TV. The evidence for pretty much all of that can be found in this week's judgement category, but we'll get there soon enough.

The Challenge

This week, the designers are asked to create a fashionable day to evening look for a woman on the go. Since FitBit is the sponsor of the episode, it seemed to me like the daytime look should be active while the evening portion should be maybe more expensive and classy. But I think I was giving too much credit to this week's pointless product placement, and I should have known better.

Either way, the question on everyone's mind should have been does my look translate from day to night. Can it be reasonably worn in both atmospheres? Will my girl be just as at home in the office as she will be out to dinner or at the club in my look? Suffice it to say, a lot of the looks didn't capture that feeling to me, but what do I know?

This week is the first challenge to bypass a trip to Mood in favor of opening up Mini Mood. Think what you will of that, it doesn't really matter to me. The emerging of certain patterns in the workroom is more interesting to me. Along those lines, it seems we're seeing a pattern of Chelsea designing something with a strong story but not much else, and missing the crucial element of it until Tim comes it to give her the one piece of advice she needs to pull it all together. 

A couple designers are going out of their comfort zones in small ways this week. Izzy chose a print that she normally would avoid. Rene is designing something with an older woman in mind. It's still got aspects of his unique aesthetic, but he's aged the look intelligently. These are the kinds of edits that will either impress the judges or sink the contestants. 

The Runway

Allie: This look is cute. The fit on the pants isn't great, but I do like the color and I like the way they mesh with the textile of the top. I also think the little bow on the back is cute. Does it transition from day to night perfectly? I can see it being worn in either setting, so I guess that's more of a yes than a no, but I'd like for the day time aspects of the looks to be more active wear inspired.

Tieler: This is probably too simple of a look. While last week it looked like Tieler wasn't resting on his immunity to carry him through, this week it looks like he didn't try much. In his defense, this is pretty solid for someone phoning it in, but it's not anywhere near as great as it should be. And there's points at the sleeves where it looks like the textile isn't matching up properly. I can't take my eyes off of those moments and not in a good way.

A'kai: The details on the back of the dress are probably the most striking aspect of it, and I wish he could have brought that flare around to the front a bit more. But ultimately, I think it's the same kind of detailing we saw on his first look. Other than that, it's all boring. He chose the wrong color palette, and there's no great or innovative design to the dress. His "night" portion of the look appears to be an evening gown, not something you'd wear to dinner with your friends. It does transition, but it doesn't transition into the portion of the night that I think it should.

Chris: No aspect of this look says evening. It's more active wear than anything we've seen so far, which I respect, but it looks cheap and unfashionable. He missed major aspects of this challenge.

Cartier: I actually like this quite a bit. The way the gold fabric interplays with the black of the slip dress and makes it shine is impressive. The two pieces compliment each other well. And while I don't think changing the vest from black to gold totally transforms the look, I do think it adds a nice wow factor.

Molly: This grew on me the more I looked at it. I was ready to slam it for not being transitional enough, but there's something about the back of the blouse that just screams night, while the front of the outfit says day to me. And the finer details on that top are really quite stunning.

Izzy: This is the definition of clothes not fashion. It's a cute enough sundress, and good for her. But there's nothing special about it and nothing about it embodies this challenge.

Rene: Perhaps I'm too partial, but I love it. I do not love the fit of the skirt, which has some odd bunching up issues that I think he should have addressed, but I do love the rest of it. I think he's very smart about the way he keeps himself in this design and still creates something for a woman who's different than his typical woman. And I like the cool leather strap details, and the way the look changes when sh takes the jacket off is quite interesting.

Hawwaa: This is stunning and quite shocking really. It looks unique and even a bit expensive. If I have one complaint it's that I wish the blue panel went all the way across the front of the skirt. I think That would make the transition even better. Because unveiling that fun print makes it look like a cool party dress, but the solid blue makes it into something reasonable to wear to work. That little bit of pink showing throws it off from that vibe just a little though, so I'd rather it all be covered and then revealed. But that's just me.

Chelsea: It's a jumpsuit made out of neoprene, it's not special, and her story doesn't make it special. I need her to design just one stunning outfit without giving all of this thought to a backstory. Then we'll see if she's actually a good designer or if she's just a passable storyteller.

Judgement

And this is where it all comes crashing down. Allie, Hawwaa, and Chelsea are in the top. Cartier, Izzy and Rene are in the bottom. 

I'm all for being disagreed with. Years of watching and writing about this show continues to inform me that I know little about fashion and about what the judges will and won't like. What I have no actual patience for is inconsistency. Project Runway has suffered through boring contestants, silly gimmicks, and pointless format changes to churn out a number of bad seasons, but for my money, the worst seasons in the history of the series were the ones in which the judging was inconsistent and nonsensical. 

Chelsea being in the top is nothing if not inconsistent. Because, and I quote from my review just last week: "Christian simply doesn't like jumpsuits. I can't disagree with his point that the jumpsuit might not be where fashion is going, but..." That's what I said last week because those were Christian's complaints about Rene and Chris' look last week. Flat and simple condemnation of the jumpsuit as a piece of fashion. And yet what did Chelsea make this week? A jumpsuit. And not only does that land her in the top three, it earns her a win. Why were jumpsuits verboten last week but lauded this week? 

Rene is sent home, and I can't help but to find that nonsensical. First off, his look is nowhere near as boring as A'kai or Tieler's, and it's not as sloppy as Chris'. You can't fall back on the excuse that he didn't get the day to night transition aspect of the challenge because none of them did. Instead, the judges complain that he's basically a one trick pony through four challenges. I'm sorry, but I simply don't think four challenges is a large enough sample size to claim that a designer only has one trick up their sleeve. How many challenges did Erin win at the beginning of last season employing the exact same techniques before we were all ready to call her on it? 

Rene has a unique and interesting aesthetic that's more mature than his age makes you think it should be. He's creating looks that are simultaneously tasteful and sexy in a way that I've continued to be impressed with. If we compare him to the designers who actually found themselves in the bottom with him, I think it's a very difficult task. I proclaimed all three of them as contestants to beat last week, and they've all put out dresses that were amazing. But I think this boils down to the question of bad ideas versus no ideas. Not that I think Cartier and Izzy have a lack of creativity, but I certainly think they both kind of phoned it in this challenge. I would have sent Izzy home this week. Rene tried, he thought of a way to design something for a woman who isn't his primary client and yet still kept his signature in it. Izzay pushed herself by picking a different fabric (which I'm not impressed by personally) and then folded when she couldn't think of anything unique to do with that fabric. In the end, she just made a boring dress. Rene's look is the one that had more design to it which I think should mean something in a design competition. 

But there you have it. On the one hand, the most undeserving contestant won, and on the other, the most undeserving contestant to be sent home was sent home. There's something about this that I simply cannot abide. It's not enough to make me stop watching this season, but it is enough to make me feel like I don't need to write about it any longer. 

Loose Threads

--There's one more aspect of the episode that left me feeling certain I don't need to keep writing up this show: the editing continues to be horrible. The runway at least hasn't been as bad as it was on the first episode, but the critique segment is really appalling. The music continues to be a distraction, and the way they're cutting those scenes leaves us with only enough time to get like one comment from each judge at best. So in the event that Christian even tried to offer up a "I know I said I hate jumpsuits, but..." kind of comment, we wouldn't know. Pure and simple, they don't know how to make an hour long episode. 

--In all of my shock and outrage over the results I forgot to mention the fact that Hawwaa got completely screwed in the offing. She totally deserved to win this week, and any other outcome is just a travesty

--Since I'll still be watching, I'll leave the possibility open that I'll chime in on a particularly great episode, assuming one exists out there somewhere. But without that, I doubt you'll hear much more from me until next season of Project Runway. If someone else wants to take over reviewing duties of this show, you're more than welcome. 

Project Runway All Stars S5 E04: "Fashion 911"

Oooh, we are going to get to design for hot firemen this week!

(Sad trombone) Much to the disappointment of all of us, especially Ken, This week's episode teases us by leading the designers to a firehouse, but a gorgeous old decommissioned firehouse, now owned by Downtown Community Television Center a free art training school for New York City's at-risk youth. 

Alvin Ailey Dance Company two weeks ago and now DCTV? Either this group of Producers are really feeling the love for New York City, or they had to make quite a promotional deal with the Office of Tourism to get their filming permits for the season. Either way, always up for fun Alyssa uses this opportunity to rock up in an ambulance, with three grim/terrified/exhausted, ok, let's say shy, first responders. So they are the clients?

Nope, this is the much beloved...

Unconventional Challenge

The remaining 11 have five minutes to run inside and scramble for fire, emergency and medical supplies. No handcuffs that I saw, just lots of hoses, gauze, breathing tubes, and gowns. There was a lot to choose from, but five minutes to think ahead? Who will be the shining star of maybe the most popular challenge of the year? As Least Popular on the Playground Sam will tell us again and again here, "Stubborn people do not do well in unconventional challenges."  Who will crash and burn? Still-furious Kini? Quietly avantgarde Emily? Buster Bluth-alike Mitchell? Adorable Dom? Sam himself?

Stubborn Stella

First sign of trouble - no leather. Second seign, Stella only grabs one ingredient to her unconventional supper: blue plastic tubing. She's imagining a Judy Jetson-style coat, or somethin'. I'll let her sketch clear it up for you: 

ahh, I see it now. It's a coat.

and when Zanna comes in for mentoring, Stella, who does not tolerate fools lightly, is not prepared for Zanna's complete bewilderment. She consults with Emily and after some thought and griping, throws together a second look, from borrowed materials.

Dom sets herself a huge task to slice up xrays and make them into an unrecognizable zebra pattern. Not sure about her red gauze and gown coat over it, but her look is solid.

Angry Ken, who has not been so angry this year, yay, has lots of hose that he didn't get to use on the hunky firecrew, so he plays with it (I'll stop now) and discover the inside is coated in a rubbery black something, that resembles leather. He goes to town making a fullskirted halter dress in stitched together 3 inch black on black stripes. It's gorgeous.

Valerie's, with a swab peplum

Asha's PeptoBismol, with added pills

Asha is having some problems. She is using pink gauze, but not as well as Layana. 

Plus her colors and style are the same as Valerie's. She makes some last minute changes, glues on some pills, a bit of shredded X-ray and ends up making a borderline hideous dress that pales in comparison to Val's very Valerie outfit.

skirt or shorts, either way, leggy

Layana is advised by Ms Marie Claire to avoid Smurfiness with her bright blue romper (?) made of textured bandages that Layana is hoping will resemble suede. the nde gauzy middle cutouts don't look as good in real life, but this looked really comfortable on the runway; the bandages had a lot of give.

Zanna advises Kini to pull it back from costume town. He is doing a flemenco skirted gown with tiers of "ruffles" made from various colored rubber gloves. Layana thinks it looks like a pinata, and she has a point, but damn, it's creative.

There is a lot of unconventional snarkiness going on as well. Okay, conventional for this show. Yes, as noted above, the designers had the option of grabbing pills from the firehouse, and too bad some of them weren't chill pills because Kini is still annoyed with Sam for not acknowledging his help last week, and Alexander is firmly team Kini. Mitchell is still feuding with him as well, so while Sam glides about, happy as a clam, the other boys turn their noses up at him and his firehose straitjacket.

Runway Time

Our guest judge is Johnny Wujek, celebrity stylist best known for making Katy Perry look like she lives in Willie Wonka's factory, and, we must remember, survivor of America's Next Top Model. He is thrilled to be there, and boy is Sam thrilled to see Johnny. Hes' drooling.

Kini, Dom, Emily, Layana, and Mitchell are safe. Mitchell should not be - he made a raggedy-ass flapper dress with sheriff's badges pinned on it willy nilly. Valerie, Ken and Sam are up top, Stella, Alexander and Asha are on the bottom.

Winner:

Sam, in a tight showdown with Ken. His almost avant-garde hose coat was a love it or hate it piece, and the judges all loved it. At the last minute Sam knocked up a nude turtlenecked tube dress to go under it, and that might have been the clincher for Isaac. Johnny Wujeck loved it as well, and Sam tossed him some charm, leading the rest of the judges to shout, "get a room, you two!" It was a bit sweet but a bit disgusting. I just don't know if I like Sam. He makes some good points, makes some good clothes, but, ultimately a spoiled pretty boy, right?

Loser:
Stella. Awww.

This is very un-her, but I could see a girl in the 80s, when Stella was 21, probably, wearing this. She used Dom's leftover Xrays to made a NYC skyline, which was cool, but the entire look  screamed "last minute" and was given the stink of "that's so Forever 21" by the judges. So goodbye grumpy Stella, back to your boyfriend Ratt (if my memory serves, that is her biker boyfriend's name). 

Biggest surprise of this entertaining episode? The huge group hug that encircled our Rock Chick as she made her way out of the show.

Lou Reed is now playing in my head...

Project Runway Junior: S1 E4 "OMG! That's Michelle Obama"

OK there's only one thing to say about this episode: SWATCH IS BACK AND HE'S OK!!!!!! Well looking a little old and sluggish, but alive and OK all the same! So there, we can all go to bed now and feel relaxed; all is right with the world. Or is it? Because given our "no one goes home" decision of last episode, we're left with two people going home this week as everyone is ready to remind us time and time again. This means either that the show is going to chicken out from this monumental moment either by not sending two people home or by letting Tim save one of them, or it means one designer who probably isn't so deserving, who probably would be safe in a regular week, is going home. So the stage is set for a naturally dramatic episode of PR JR; probably the most dramatic episode we've seen thus far, but will the challenge and everything else deliver?

Well the challenge starts things off in the right way. The designers are tasked with creating a modern look for a fashionable "girl on the go." To give them a jolt, Michelle Obama shows up on the screen and, not going to lie, I knew it was coming and I still screamed like a little girl with excitement when I saw her. Because she's Michelle fucking Obama! No shame!

The lovely and resplendent (angelic too much? No, I'm going with angelic) First Lady talks to the designers about Let Girls Learn, a White House initiative that is really exactly what it sounds like. She also tells them that the winning designer will be given the opportunity to partner with Lands' End to create a backpack the proceeds of which will go towards Let Girls Learn. So this brings me to something else I'm enjoying about PR JR thus far: the rewards beyond immunity simply feel bigger, more interesting, and more important that the rewards for that other show I can't remember the name of at the moment. This is because the rewards here are less about giving the designers stupid swag and more about giving them a way to leave a serious impact on the world or the world of fashion with their young brands. If your look is getting produced and photographed, or the pattern you use is being mass marketed online for other designers, or you're getting a hand in creating something for a good cause, that's so much cooler and more important than getting a 3D Printer for your own personal use.

But anyway, there's a big spinning gameshow wheel on the stage and the designers are spinning it to see what kind of girl they're designing for. Categories available are School, Work, Travel, and Party. And the breakdown of who gets what:

• Maya: Sporty
• Zachary: Party
• Jesse: School
• Victoria: School
• Matt: Travel
• Zach: Party
• Samantha: Work
• Peytie: Travel
• Bridget: School
• Jaxson: Sporty

First things first, "Travel" is a weird category. Or maybe it's just a weird one for young people to be given. Is there a specific look that you see someone wearing and say "Oh she must be traveling?" I know I don't, which makes me think from the start that Matt and Peytie are at an odd disadvantage here. Or maybe since they can literally interpret it to mean whatever they want it to, they have an advantage? We'll circle back around to this later.

Jaxson is the most worried about his category seeing as how he doesn't feel much like his design aesthetic is sporty in the slightest. He decides to do a kind of Jersey inspired dress which reminds me of something we've seen before but I don't feel like looking for it at the moment. At Mood he gets this stark white fabric the likes of which seems to be used on basketball jerseys. Sadly, he would have been better off with a kind of jersey knit fabric, but that's neither here nor there. Peytie finds a print that speaks to her typical hippie/tribal aesthetic. On the roll, this fabric is an eyesore and everything about it says stay away, but since it was Peytie grabbing it, I honestly didn't feel worried. 

Back in the workroom, Tim shows up with some chick from the Peace Corps, and I honestly have no idea why. She talks about the fact that there are girls working with the Peace Corps, which is a surprise to no one at all, and then she leaves. That's the kind of moment they should have had for the designers and then left on the cutting room floor since it adds nothing to our viewing experience. 

Early on in the design process, shots are fired from Zachary at Victoria when he comments that she constantly makes the same top over and over again. She takes offense and isn't shy about telling him he should worry about his own look and leave her's alone. Everything this season has been pretty copesetic between the designers often verging on lovey. And I've remarked multiple times that I like that about the show, but I'd be lying if I said this little exchange didn't make me giggle a bit. To his credit, I don't think Zachary's comments were meant to be mean-spirited so much as observant and maybe even constructive, but his statements lacked tact and hit at a worry Victoria was having anyway. 

Tim's visit a little bit later shows me what I've been missing in a Tim Gunn visit lately. He talks to Jaxson who is missing the mark, he tells him he's unimpressed, he questions why the look has to be a dress and Jaxson responds that he doesn't want it to be shorts. Tim returns with, "Are those the only two options?" at which point Jaxson's eyes light up and he says Romper like it's the magic word that will breath life into the entire look. Tim nods and points out that Jaxson was the one that said it as if to point out that the potential for the idea was there all along, and now he's got a road map going forward. And it's that back and forth that was missing last episode and from a lot of what we saw last season. "Mentor" is Tim's job title, and you can see him doing and being that most when we get to hear some of this back and forth. He's stern when he doesn't like something, but he sticks around and gently leads the designers to where they need to be. 

Or, as is the case with Victoria, maybe he does a bit too much and over plays his hand. Tim says, much like Zachary before him, that Victoria's becoming a bit of a One Way Money™ by making the same look over and over again. So the two of them stand there and he tells her to remove the skirt leaving the look with a pair of short shorts, and then tells her to use her other fabric on the top to make it pop. Zachery, away from Victoria's line of hearing, comments that Tim basically designed her look for her and now she's little more than a seamstress. I don't know why this intervention by Tim doesn't bother me, but it doesn't. I'm guessing if these weren't kids, it would bother me more, but in this situation, I'm honestly OK with it. Also, I don't feel like we've seen him doing this with only one designer in the way we saw him working with Ashley last season, so at least it's not favoritism. 

The only thing left is the model fitting and yet more of Jaxson working til the last minute to turn his look out and be runway ready. This portion of the show has become perfunctory and kind of pointless. Some contestants have looks to try on, some don't, and that's all there is to it. So I think from now on unless something important happens, I'll start to go right from Tim's critique to the runway. 

The Runway:

Samantha: I like it more on the runway than I did on the dressform. Does it scream “Work” to you? It says more “Travel” to me. It’s not professional attire, but it looks like the kind of perfect match for someone who might be traveling between two places with different weather. The looks underneath seem more warm/cool wear, and then you throw the coat on overtop of it all and you’re ready to go into somewhere a bit colder. It’s a long way of me saying that I like this look but I don’t know that it fits her category. 

Jesse: NO! I do think the skirt is too school uniform which can take this a bit costumey, except that those uniform skirts would never be paired with that top. I don’t like this, but I will say that I can see how someone might. To someone else, those two elements might not be as discordant as they are to me. But either way, I’m not a fan. 

Bridget: I love love love this. The fit is breathtaking, the flannel shirt tied around the waist is a kind of ingenious 90’s throwback but the fact that it isn’t actually just a shirt (or is it? I can’t fully tell) and is just a specially made tie is so smart and creative. I love the look and the styling so much. And it totally says “School” without being too obvious about it. 

Victoria: OK nothing at all about this says school. I don’t know what school Victoria is attending, but when I was a kid, this girl would have been sent home before she even got off the bus. With that being said, I like the look a lot. It fits like a glove, it’s super sexy, and it’s something different from her without feeling like she’s totally lost herself in the process. I like it, but it doesn’t fit all challenge parameters. 

Peytie: I like this a lot more from the back than I do the front which I find boring except for the print. And here we see the problem with the "Travel" category. Do you dress for where you’re going or where you’re leaving? It’s this weird liminal thing. But to those ends, Samantha’s look feels more like travel wear to me than this does. This feels more at home in “Party” if you ask me. It’s cute, but again not 100% what was asked for, but in this case I think that’s not her fault so much as the fault of the stupid category she had. 

Matt: Same thing here. This is beautiful beautiful beautiful. But no one is getting on a plane in a ball gown. I’m still blaming this on what is a stupid category, but I also don’t know which category this would go in. It can be “Party” if we’re talking about an after hours Oscar party. Maybe “Work” if you work as a fashion model for an elegant designer. But that’s it. I don’t want that to detract from what is easily the best thing we’ve seen from Matt thus far and totally serves as justification for keeping him around last week, but still. 

Jaxson: ……… I’m happy he likes it. I don’t hate it, but I can’t like it either. I do think there’s something “Sporty” about it in a lot of ways beyond just the type of fabric he used. But the cut of the neckline is really distracting, as are the seams in the romper. And the combination of the metallic fabric and the this spaghetti straps makes it almost look a little trashy. Maybe I do hate it a little bit.

Maya: Perfection! The top, the asymmetry, the zipper, the fit on the pants, all of it is just great. It does say “Sporty” and without screaming it in your face. My favorite so far. 

Zachary: Color and movement and the cut of the top and the train are gorgeous. This is a kid who really knows how to dress a woman’s body. I like the skin showing; it’s one of the only high waisted pants I’ve ever really liked. The neck reminds me a bit of Maya’s from last challenge in how stirking it is if not in the cut of it, but I like it all a lot. The seam on the back of the cape is a bit distracting, but that could be purposeful. “Party?” I guess…

Zach: I’ll praise the cut and the fit of this which I think works out well. That print is all wrong though. You walk into a party like that and you’ll get laughed out. The print is too busy for how designed the whole thing is. I don’t think he needed a flat color for it, but maybe two solid tones that complimented each other? Or at least just a quieter print or a simpler design.

The judges' critiques go quicker than last episode, but they're also highly informative. Zachery, Maya, and Peytie are in the top, Jesse, Jaxson, and Victoria are in the bottom. The key points I responded to were Aya's statement that Jaxson's look was more costume than fashion and Jesse's look was clothing and not fashion, and Kelly's point that seeing something different from Victoria almost exclusively means color at this point and not just the cut of an outfit. I thought, and still think, that the change in the cut of Victoria's outfit is enough to suggest the ability to present something else from her, and I liked that she was able to change that while at least keeping her usual (read: Black) aesthetic, but Kelly's point is valid too. 

Over on the top side, Christian has a lot of great things to say about Zachary's intelligence in creating something that could be either a cape or an overlay and yet it just works both ways. Kelly's compliment to Peytie that she chooses prints and works with them in a way that makes Kelly love her looks in spite of the fact that they go so much against her own typical tastes is really great. But the winner here for me is Maya since I didn't hear anything they said to her after I saw her zip up the zipper and transform her look into something else entirely. My jaw dropped at the turtleneck she created by zipping that zipper. They might as well have been two totally different outfits and both of them are breathtaking. 

And yet Peytie wins the challenge. I've been a bit more forgiving on the last three episodes' winners; I haven't agreed with many of them, but I've at least understood the decision. And to be honest, I love Peytie's look (from the back) and I can see how this would be a winning look in another challenge that doesn't feature Maya's outfit. The fact is that Maya's look is ready to be manufactured and sold right now. Girls everywhere would spend a lot of money on it, and rightfully so. Maybe the judges thought Peytie's backpack design for Lands' End would be stronger than Maya's were she to win, but getting to see the finished product of the bag at the end of the episode, I have to wonder at the wisdom behind that. Either way it's not the first time I've questioned the decision on the winning look, and I'm guessing it won't be the last. 

Meanwhile, Jesse and Victoria are the two designers sent home, and true to their word, the show allows them both to go. No backing out, no Tim Gunn save, just a quick and sad goodbye to them both. Jaxson gets the save because again bad ideas, or even good ideas executed poorly, are better than no ideas. And Victoria seems to only have one trick while Jesse decided to make clothes instead of fashion. I don't know how much I agree with this decision so I'll leave the conjecture on it to others. My biggest take away actually has more to do with the decision from last episode in connection to the decision from this week. 

Roll with me for a minute here; these were the looks that were in the bottom two but were saved from elimination last episode:

Now look again at Victoria and Jesse's looks from this week which were sent home. Now, I'm not saying that Jesse's look specifically isn't bad enough to be in the bottom and even sent home this week, but is it really worse than the two from last week? Couple that with Jesse's exceptional unconventional materials look and you've got one misstep in an otherwise strong body of work. Conversely, this week is the first time we've seen something "strong" from Matt, and yet it doesn't really fit in with the girl he was given and it was ultimately only safe--not in the top. And Samantha's look this week was a lot better than last week (in my opinion) but it's also not something that's wholly unique from her; certainly no moreso than Victoria's look is. So as much as I'd hate to bring up the "f" word, is it really fair that we lose Jesse and Victoria this week when we could have lost Matt and/or Samantha last week and avoided this? It was unavoidable that someone undeserving would be going home. Or at least someone who otherwise wouldn't have gone home had we just been getting rid of one contestant. But it's looking to me like we might have lost two contestants who may not have deserved to go. Couple that with the fact that I think Jaxson's look really is the worst of the three (impressive innovation not withstanding) and you've got a bit of a quagmire here. But I guess time will tell and that should be a conversation for another week. 

Loose Threads:

--So clearly these reviews are coming later than the regular PR reviews did, and I apologize for that, but this week there was at least a better reason for it than usual: I was all set to write the review on Friday after work, but my day at work ended with me losing my job along with a few of my friends in an unexpected layoff. So as you can imagine, my weekend was a lot more stressful and hectic than originally planned, and that's why I didn't get around to watching the episode and writing it up until tonight. My days for the foreseeable future will be spent applying for every job I can find in order to get back up on my feet as quickly as possible, but it's safe to assume that reviews will be late on a regular basis from now on. That's assuming my roommate and I don't have to cut out the cable all together and I start missing the episodes. Fingers crossed everything's OK soon. 

--This episode saw Maya's 14th birthday and that was cute and sweet. I was wondering if they didn't give her the win specifically to avoid looking like they were giving her a b-day gift in the form of immunity. Either way, wrong decision.

--I feel like this was the most colorful episode we've seen thus far, but I could be wrong about that. It felt like they ask them to design for a young girl and out comes the color. 

--Jaxson dominates this episode in a way that made me feel sure he was going home. Meanwhile, Jesse and Victoria are there but not as much focus as Jaxson got. It was a nice little misdirect on the part of the producers. 

--Seriously though, Sundaynightaddict, did you see Swatch was back?!?!?!! I literally screamed and cheered at that moment. 

--Back to my thoughts about the elimination this week: I feel like I should say that I don't think given everything we've seen that Jesse or Victoria honestly had a shot to win the whole thing, so I don't think losing them but keeping Samantha and Matt is a huge loss for the show as a whole. But on the other hand, I don't think Matt realistically has a shot to win either and the more I see from Samantha, the more one note I find her to be. She plays her note well, but it's still the same note over and over again and I'm bored with it. I don't want her to lose her aesthetic as I think it's beautiful and important in a world with complicated gender politics to begin with, but I do want to know that she can do something other than questionably made oversized coats. And if she can't, I'm going to get more and more upset over the fact that she didn't go home last week. </rant>

Project Runway: S14 E4: "Fashion Flip"

I think we've all been around long enough to know that some of the worst seasons on PR have been doomed by uneven judging. Someone wins you don't expect or think deserves it, someone goes home that's just really odd, the judges like something they shouldn't or didn't like last week and probably won't like next week, it can all be a bit jarring. And while I don't think that the worst seasons of the show were as bad as they were solely because the judging was sporadic, I do know that that certainly doesn't help any. So my gut reaction here is to ask if we're dealing with that again this year, but before we can rightfully engage with that question, I think we have to take on the episode as a whole.

Remember when I praised last week's episode for its streamlined opening and doing away with the pointless opening segments of the show? No contestants waking up and recapping what happened in the last challenge, no Heidi sending them off with stupid cryptic messages to go meet Tim so he could make the challenge clear. Well guess what's back this week! Honestly, I don't mind the contestants waking up and chatting a bit because I enjoyed hearing what everyone thought after the team challenge. It seems, to quote Merline, that things have just got real in the PR house. Prior to being on teams, everyone for the most part liked each other, but now the gloves are off and everyone's remembering that this is a competition and friend's aren't in the offing. So that's nice. Less nice is Heidi's stupid message before sending them all off. Honestly, I understand you want to get the most out of Heidi as your host, but what real purpose does this moment serve other than to eat up time?

The designers go out to meet Tim on the waterfront, and are told that this is the Mary Kay challenge. Usually, unless I'm mistaken, that means that the designers are to get inspired by some new Mary Kay color scheme and go from there. But this time around it just means that they'll get an earlier makeup consultation and they have to be inspired by the New York skyline. It's a foggy and smoggy New York morning, so they basically have to imagine the skyline and then get inspired by it. And they have to take a classic design form and make it modern. It's all wide open to interpretation which I think is a good thing for this early in the competition as it gives the designers more time to shine while also allowing for bigger failures. Also, the winner of this challenge gets $5000 and their look in an editorial in Marie Clare. So it's a pretty big deal this early in the competition.

Once everyone's done sketching, it's off to the first trip to Mood, and I didn't realize just how much I missed Mood until this moment. I like the idea of Mood being the reward for designers sticking around long enough to earn it. Like the first three people to go home weren't even worthy to walk through the front doors. There's an extended cut of people running around, buying fabric for the first time, and talking about their thought process on which fabrics to buy. There's a lot of talking but very little substance, and not nearly enough Swatch for me, but oh well.

Back in the workroom we discover that Blake doesn't know how to tell time, or that he thinks it's cute and funny to pretend like he doesn't know how to tell time. What I find interesting about Blake's edit so far this season is that when they cut to the other designers for reaction shots to his antics, none of them look amused. They don't have very positive things to say and it's clear that they don't think his idiocy is appealing. So why does he keep it up? Are these the first people to find him annoying instead of endearing? If so, that would explain a lot, and it left me thinking that my main problem with Blake is that he clearly wasn't beaten up enough as a child. I don't like bullying, and I think it's a horrible problem facing kids, and especially gay kids, but someone should have shoved this little asshole in a locker a couple more times and maybe he would have learned his lesson.

Anyway, on to Tim's visit which happens to be the first visit of the season where I think he actually remembered that he's supposed to be helpful and mentor these guys instead of just giving funny soundbites to use later. He responds favorably to a lot of the looks, and offers some solid advice to Amanda and Gabrielle who both really need a pick-me-up. Gabrielle, at some point, decided that she was going to just stop working on her dress and wait around for Tim to show up, which I think is a horrible idea and had a lot to do with the unfinished quality of her final look, but more on that in a minute. Blake also doesn't have anything done and is trying to convince Tim that his bold vision is something that will totally work once he starts working on it. Here's a tip, Blake, if you at least have something, literally anything done by the time Tim gets there, he'll be better able to see where you're heading and what your vision is, and he can advise you accordingly. Presenting him with just the ideas in your head isn't going to get you anywhere.

Also of interest is the fact that Edmond has two dresses in the process of being made. This reminds me of last week when he just whipped up a new swimsuit out of nowhere and in seemingly no time at all. If he's constantly the guy that's working on two things at once before deciding which to concentrate on and send down the runway, that'll come back and bite him in his ass. I can't even begin to imagine how that approach will work when they get to the Couture challenge.

There was a Mary Kay consultation that I missed because it seemed like the perfect time for a bathroom break, and a model fitting where we learned that Laurie got a new and slightly opinionated model, but we don't find out why she needed the model change in the first place. And Blake still hasn't actually sewn anything together. He pins muslin on the model to get an idea of how the dress will sit. He might have learned how to tell time earlier but he certainly didn't learn how to manage it.

Of course he's left scrambling the next morning before the runway. Gabrielle joins him in the race to the finish since she put all her energy and effort into her jacket and seemingly forgot that the dress underneath it was just as important. So it's off to the runway where we're joined by guest judge Kiernan Shipka from Mad Men. She's young and cute and very polite with nice things to say about all the designers and no real bark or bite. I found her boring, but I love Sally Draper, so hey.

The Runway:

Blake: I hate it. The sides around the legs remind me of what I hated about his look last week, the pinned up back is weird and not intriguing and it reminds me of a girl who got her hair trapped in an unopened parachute or something. Nothing about the look is wearable at all, and the construction is horribly sloppy and haphazard. He needs to learn that if he wants to do all that work, he needs more time. 

Kelly: I actually really like this. I think it embodies the challenge well. It’s a nice new take on a standard white t-shirt and I can see the New York skyline influence. I think it was a very smart choice to pair it with those cute and simple black pants too. And I like her model’s styling, good job all around. 

Joseph: The split and the open back makes it look younger than his usual fare, but that's about all the good I can say about it. The top stitching would show better on a different fabric or a different colored fabric. Without being able to see that detail it looks a bit like a breastplate. The seams around the neckline and the arms were showing and looked messy and unfinished, and the whole thing looks a bit boring and simple. 

Linsey: I hate it. I can’t be certain why I hate it other than the fact that I hate the color of the jacket and the textile on the outfit underneath, and I think the proportions are all wrong, and it’s a bit simple, so OK I actually do know why I hate it, and I still hate it. 

Ashley: What if instead of the open back there was a keyhole cut out in the front? Would that be cute, or make it a bit trashy? I can’t be sure, but I do think it’d make me like the dress a little more. I don’t hate it as is, but I do think the colors are oddly muted and uninteresting. The tule overlay on it all is an interesting touch, but I don’t think it gives the dress any element of actual wearability. And I can’t decide who I think would honestly wear it. I don’t think I’d put her in the bottom just yet, but it’s not my favorite.

Laurie: I want the black leather-looking fabric on the top gone, and that bow aspect just toned down a little bit and then I’d love it. I like the skirt a lot, and I like the idea of the top a lot more than I like the execution of it. But I think the black fabric is a distraction and not an enhancement and it makes the top look a bit too busy.

Jake: I hate it, but oddly enough what I hate about most is that the number on it is in black and doesn’t pop out enough from the rest of the dress. I get what he was going for, and I’ll actually give him credit for the attempt, but had he done the number in white or in a different color that stood out but still complimented the pink of the dress, I’d like it a lot more. I don’t mind the length as much as I thought I would. 

Amanda: Ok I guess. I neither like it nor hate it, it’s just kind of there. I wish the white half of the top had been done differently somehow, but I can’t tell how. 

Swapnil: Oh Swapnil, I love you, but I so wish the front had looked a bit more purposeful. There’s something about it that I think looks thrown together and haphazard in a way that I don’t find appealing. I like the back, and I like the overall effect of her turning around and seeing that back in such a manner, but I really am not a fan of the front. 

Merline: There’s a lot going on in this design and while I think she maybe could have done one less thing to it, I like it a lot. It feels to me like the kind of high fashion look Blake wanted to create but didn’t have the time to pull together. Comparatively, this look is finished and polished and eye catching in a way that I appreciate. I like it a lot the more I think about it. 

Gabrielle: There’s a weird fit issue with the dress, right? Or is it just me? Again, I don’t hate it or anything, but I don’t like it much either. I don’t know. I’d probably at least say safe, but we’ll see. 

Candice: Yes please and thank you. I don’t like to throw the word fierce around too much, but I can’t think of any other word to describe this look. The fit on this dress is just fucking to die for. Her woman looks strong, sexy, and in control in a way that's just ridiculous. I wish I could have seen it with the jacket on for a little while longer, but the effect of taking that off and just having the dress there was amazing. Loved it!

Edmond: I want it to be like maybe an inch or so longer (that’s what she said) and then I’d love it. The rest of it I like a lot, and I like the architectural aspect of it. I think it’s a really nice look that’s just a little bit too short. 

Now for the judging; Candice, Swapnil, and Blake are in the top. Yes, Blake is in the top. And Amanda, Gabrielle, and Lindsey are in the bottom. I'm a lot less confused by who's in the bottom than I am by who's in the top. Or specifically by Blake's being in the top. If you wanted to make him safe and send him off with a "Blake, we actually really liked your look and you just missed the top three by a hair," I'd think you were crazy but I'd go with it. Putting him in the top seems ridiculous to me. But then the judges started critiquing and I actually understood their thinking even while not really agreeing with it. 

When they said they wanted a new twist on a classic look, they never said it had to be practical or wearable, just that it had to be new. Heidi praises Blake for producing a silhouette they've never seen on the show before, and Nina and Zac praise him for being original and thinking outside of the box while not fully losing the look of his inspiration. No one really mentions the poor construction, but oh well I guess. 

They have nice things to say about Swapnil's dress, but are clearly blown away by Candice's look. They even have an extended moment with her as she talks about how hard it is to be away from her kids, but how happy she is to know her family supports her and has her back. There's no mention of the fact that she has immunity and still turns out a look that fabulous, but I can't help but to think it's implied. The writing for her win is on the wall and the rest just seems like a formality. 

Amanda spent a lot of time in this episode lamenting the fact that she's been in the bottom three for the last two challenges and she doesn't know what the judges want to see from her. So she tried to go out of her way to give them what she thought they wanted and went with something a bit more simple and paired down and then of course was smashed on the runway for how simple and paired down her look was. She admits that she wanted less crazy since she's been criticized for going crazy in the past, but the judges all pretty much tell her more crazy, go full on crazy, dye your fabric in human feces type crazy. I get the impression she'll try and take that advice next week and get sent home. We've seen her type on the show before, and the fact of the matter is that designers who try so hard to give the judges what they want instead of just trusting in their own abilities and unique vision don't do well on this show. Is Amanda capable of creating something like what Candice or Kelly created in this challenge? The truth is that I doubt it because she doesn't seem to have that kind of strong unique vision, but so long as she's fishing for a compliment from the judges and trying to conform to some kind of secret formula for winning the challenges, we'll never know for sure. 

Gabrielle's outfit is just a total mess. From the moment she mentioned adding a pop of pink to the dress and Zac pointed out that they couldn't see any pink at all until she took off the jacket, you knew she was doomed. If it doesn't show up on the runway, keep that kind of shit to yourself, baby girl. I hate to give him credit for anything, but notice how Blake didn't say a damn word about what he did to the neckline of his dress until Zac caught a sneak peak of it and asked him what the necklace was hiding? That's what Gabrielle should have done about that little bit of pink on that dress. 

Either way, Gabrielle goes home and Blake wins the challenge. Yes, that's right, Blake wins. For a second, let's ignore the fact that I hate him and often fantasize about punching him in the mouth in an attempt to shut him up. Let's ignore the fact that I hate the dress he sent down the runway no matter what the judges might have thought about it. Let's focus on one thing and one thing only: The winning look is going to be photographed and laid out in a spread in Marie Clare magazine. If you can convince me that Blake's look will photograph better and be more interesting on the page than either Candice or Swapnil's looks, then I won't complain about this decision anymore. But the truth of the matter is that you can't convince me of that because it isn't fucking true. Maybe with a little more time to actually finish the dress so it isn't being held together with pins and tape, and maybe with a better styled model and something different going on with the razor back, maybe it'll be ready to photograph. But if it needs that much work to be worthy of the magazine, then did it really deserve to win? You can take Candice's look and her model right from the runway to the fashion shoot and that look is ready to go. The same cannot be said for this winning look and I'm honestly a bit floored by that. I don't think this is the worst and most inconsistent judging we've seen from the show, but this is certainly the first time that I can't wrap my head around the winning look at all, and that worries me at least a little bit. 

Loose Threads:

--Interestingly enough the designers all really like Gabrielle and are seriously sad to see her go. It's not that I'm surprised by this as she seems likable enough, but I didn't think we'd gotten much chance to really get to know her one way or the other, so it was interesting to see. Tim's also sad and seemingly a bit surprised to see her go, but not surprised enough to save her. So there's that. 

--Swapnil solidified himself as my favorite with his confusion over the setting of Breakfast at Tiffany's and his silly excitement over finally getting to go to Mood. He's just too adorable for words. 

--Speaking of Swapnil, this is also the third challenge in a row that he's been in the top three. I don't think he really deserved the win this week like he has in the past, but he's putting together a consistently strong showing. I'd honestly say he's looking better right now than Ashley is even with her two wins under her belt. 

--Luckily for Candice, winning last week didn't land her in the bottom or being complained about save for her immunity this week. Ashley may not have been in the top, but there was at least no indication that her being safe was only due to her immunity, so that's a step in the right direction. 

--Has anyone else noticed that Zac seems nicer and gentler with the gay guys than he does with the ladies? I first noticed this back in the first episode when he seemed to go a bit out of his way to say something nice about Duncan and Blake's looks even though they were in the bottom though he didn't extend that same kindness to Han. And now this week there seemed to be even more gentleness towards Blake as he talked about the neckline of the dress and didn't bash him for how unfinished it all was. Unfair double standard, man!

Under the Gunn S1 E4: "Unconventional Vampire"

This is a show that is as much about perfecting mentoring as it is about perfecting design skills. Last week, we watched as both Mondo and Anya set their egos and personality aside in order to help their designers realize their vision. We also watched as Nick. V. reallytookover other...people's...deSIGN, and hisss designers failed. This is not a trap that Tim Gunn ever fell into.

This week...Well, you'll see.

This week's product placement is a movie that nobody bothered to see this weekend, Vampire Academy. In no small part because it went up against The Lego Movie. To set up the atmosphere, the producers make the designers stand outside, at night, with an overpumped fog machine, front lit by blue highlights and shadowy red low-lights and with a bright white backlight. It sounds a lot like a club scene from an early 2000s movie (American Psycho, Vanilla Sky, etc). 

The designers are forced to watch the trailer for the movie they're never going to see before they get 10 minutes to go through "Vampire Land" where they can pull up to FIVE FUCKING BOLTS OF FABRIC and any and as many unconventional materials they find. So, this isn't really an unconventional challenge. This is a half-assed unconventional challenge, for a reportedly half-assed movie (that wasn't screened for critics). 

The problem with a half-assed unconventional challenge is that it throws everybody for a loop. The designers, the mentors, and even, as we'll see, the judges. The designers start out with a mix of ability to deal with unconventional materials, but find their directions.

But, before we even get there, Tim Gunn sets the theme for the day. He chops off Nick V's ego by telling him to back off. He boosts Anya's ego by telling her to stay the course. And, he undercuts Mondo's strength by telling him that he needs to be more critical than emotionally supportive.

In the first round of critiques, when faced with strong designers, Mondo actually becomes timid and isn't able to balance his need to please Tim with his desire to support the designers and an ability to provide a critical eye. This week, all of his designers have strong viewpoints. Michelle has a great design place to start. Asha will always have a forceful point of view (even if it sometimes needs taste issues). And, Sam is one of the stronger designers.

Anya, on the other hand, now has a huge fucking ego. Sometimes she says something smart, but most of the time it is also so self-unaware. She tells Brady, whose taste is a young punk aesthetic that, like Mondo, pushes Junior, that he needs to stop pushing Junior. Which sends Brady into a tailspin that has him designing for an old person. Then she supports Nicholas who is creating a weird chainy taupey boring thing. 

Nick V, released from being a hands-on mother hen, now becomes a critical queen who demands everything to fit his aesthetic. When it comes to Oscar, its OK, because Nick knows Oscar needs editing. But, then Nick fights tooth and nail with Isabelle. He starts changing her design at every stage. Later, he says "You can do whatever you want to do. I'm just here to suggest...I love your point of view, I just want this ... I don't want you to lose you." Jesus, he is the Queen of Mixed Messages. Do this. No, do what you want to do, but do this anyways. Dating him seems like it would be impossibibble. Can you imagine?  This is coming from somebody who really liked Nick when he would make his appearances as a judge or a talking head. 

Isabelle, also, isn't a great communicator. Partially because English isn't her first language, I imagine. She always seems to be searching for words. And, with Nick's weird speech patterns, I'm sure it throws her for loops. So, she gets lost in the whirlwind of Nick, who seems to have been edited to be focusing strongly on Isabelle. Especially since Nick's other designers are completely ignored for the majority of the episode. Who were they again? 

In the end, for the most part it is a conventional challenge. Lacey-like fabric gets used as lacey-like fabric. Teeth are sewn to lapels. Chains are covered in fabric to hide their unconventionality. Necklaces are torn apart so that beats can be glued onto dresses of traditional fabric. It's not really all that hybrid. And, nobody really calls anybody out for that. Not Tim Gunn, not the mentors, and barely the judges. 

So, runway time. Apparently Jen Rade, Zanna Roberts Rossi, and Rachel Ray are supposed to be the permanent judges. But, Rachel Ray is out today, giving us Trina Turk. And, we also get Zoey Deutch, a 19-year-old actress who has been in the business for almost 4 years, starting on Disney, where I'm sure she had stylists helping her out.

Team Nick

• Natalia - A red take on the Morticia Adams dress, only with too much fabric on top. With a bunch of netting thrown on at the waist in a sad attempt at an unconventional corset.
• Stephanie - A white power suit dress with some beads glues on and some black netting sloppily thrown on as a collar.
• Isabelle - A sloppy navy blue dress that looks interesting with a whirlwind of red netting weaved around her. It's at least unconventional.
• Oscar - This is the first outfit that embraces the challenge. It's a slick, creepy, dress that weaves fabric with the red netting in a seamless fashion. It's slick, and only actual parts of the dress look gratuitous instead of whole materials themselves. Namely, the shoulder pads, which...what? It would have been perfect without those. They give off costume. 

Team Anya

• Brady - Totally lost his way when Anya told him to not go so junior. So, he created a junior shift dress from a conventional fabric. And, threw an ill-fitting blue blazer on top of it. With his only unconventional material being the tiny little vampire teeth he sewn onto his lapels. So boring. 
• Shan - Made a chic Racer Badass outfit using unconventional materials as accents. But, at least it looks OK. 
• Nicholas - A sloppy brown dress with sad brown hoses attached to it. It's sort of like a female version of Jacob Marley fell into the mud.
• Blake - A little black dress with black netting sloppily thrown onto it at the waist.

Team Mondo

• Sam - Here's something new. An unconventional top of black netting over white fabric that looks like cheap black cut outs, but with a conventional bottom, and a belt made out of plastic Halloween decoration fence posts. The unconventional/conventional challenge is hard hammered together for a hard/soft, but the top is still hideous.
• Michelle - A stunning snakey dress, with a dramatic wood nymph collar. While its almost getting into Stephanie territory, especially with sloppiness, it at least seems like she thought about the transition of the bust with the collar so it doesn't seem as jarring. Especially since the collar netting comes down to form the whole back of Michelle's dress, which is slick and hot.
• Asha - Power Voodoo Priestess. The unconventional material is used as the skirt. Which adds an edge and also looks very witchy.

Since Oscar was actively helping other designers (namely Nicholas) with their designs, the makeup people awarded Oscar with a free $1k. Sometimes it pays to be a good guy. I like that. Yay Under the Gunn!!

Oscar, Michelle and Asha are in the top for obvious reasons. Brady, Isabelle, and Nicholas are in the bottom...again for obvious reasons. Brady and Isabelle suffered at the hands of their egotistical designers. Nicholas suffered from not enough attention. In the end, Anya has to make the final elimination decision between Brady the Junior Designer, or Nicholas the Menswear Designer. Somehow, she chooses to eliminate Brady, who should be here because he knows women. Nicholas, though, has less of a clue on how to design for women. His inexperience shows. Also, Michelle wins.

Random Observations

• Sorry about the delay. I caught a good fever starting on Wednesday that wasn't even close to being done with me until yesterday, and I still felt like shit yesterday. Apologies
• Zoey is so cute when she is disappointed. Nooo! Considering actresses can play high school into their mid-20s she potentially has a career for awhile. 
• Why Anya, WHY?!?

Project Runway All-Stars S3 E4: "Keepin' It Classy"

I think we all felt this way by the end of the episode.

Every Project Runway All-Stars host starts to reach a sort of middling stride mid-season. Alyssa Milano is starting to really loosen up compared to when she began. It's almost like the producers were watching the dailies and told her to be more natural, and she finally figured out how. While she still doesn't have the dominating presence that we've come to expect from Frau Klum, Alyssa is starting to loosen up in front of the camera and become an interesting figure. Her faux accent is starting to slip a little. And, her teeth are unclenching. And, she's starting to feel fun.

Which is good because we're bringing back one of the most famous challenges ever, you guys!  Maybe some of you don't remember this challenge, but we're bringing back the unconventional challenge!  ZOMG! I remember seeing this like 2 months ago, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about it! It was so hard when they had to go to like a wallpaper store and a hardware store. Or, maybe they had to go to Coney Island and cut up animals. Or, maybe...anyways, we haven't seen this challenge in awhile, and it's back! ZOMG. Be still my beating heart!

Bur, what is our challenge, outside of an unconventional challenge?  Well, we have to take a trip to find out...in a SCHOOL BUS! Immediately, my gay ass starts worrying that this is going to be an anti-bullying episode, because I spent my time on the school bus blasting KMFDM and Nine Inch Nails at volumes that pierced everybody else's ear drums. Immediately the designers start fucking around on the school bus. And, they're being taken to PS 212, some school in NYC. So, it's not an anti-bullying after school special, but it is a mad dash challenge, in the vein of that time they tore up their apartments in the first episode.  They have 4 minutes to get everything, and...

Oh, fuck...Pansear. Really?  You have to bring the bullying? I know it's uncouth for me to say, because solidarity and I was bullied and blah blah blah but...*sigh*. So, because of the bullying, we know that Pansear is not going home because emotional backstory = stay. But, then we have the fight between Korto and Necktat for who's going home as they're both revealing a bit much in the asides. And, a little bit of Mychael. And, they're all starting to make really REALLY ugly shit. 

I've also really been in love with Korto's revealing.  Every time, she's like "Bitches, I'm here for the money. Why the fuck am I here?" This time, she's revealing its all about her daughter and growing her business to provide for her child. And, Awwww.  But, she still doesn't want to be here. Meanwhile, Pansear is still ranting about bullying. And, he'll not stop until the runway. 

During Zanna's consultations, she's all worried about the outfits that she should be worried about, and enthusiastic about some of the ones she also should be worried for. Korto's look starts out looking like a rejected costume from Hackers, but then we see her start doing shit with rubber bands that starts making it look like a homemade Marching Band outfit. And, Zanna is worried about Mychael's progress because he hasn't done much of anything, and insult's Necktat lego foam dress. And, ooooooof. There's the origins of some serious ugly in the room. And, then there's a twist. Because PS 212 isn't a commercial tie in, this is the Mary Kay tie in episode, where two people consult on makeup whose advice seems to get ignored the next day.

And, soon its time to go to runway, where I fully expect to see Dan "I have 2 shirts" Savage representing It Gets Better because, well, bullying and high school. Instead, we get the fantastic Gabourey Sidibe, from Precious, the New York high school movie about bullying in the inner city. And, also Michael Urie, who was in...um...*checks IMDB* Partners and Ugly Betty. He also directed He's Way More Famous Than You...which, um...  Poor guy. Maybe he was the one who replaced Dan Savage. 

Anyways, Runway.

Irina: I hate to admit it...this was my favorite look on the runway today. It was over the top pink and princessy, which is a total departure for Irina, but its well made and it doesn't entirely look like it was made from other materials. It looks like some weird combination of a little girl's fantasy dress and 80s pop summer gone to France. I just...I hate loving it. But, it's so awesome.

Pansear: He totally trainspotted Mychael's look from last week. It's hard plastic armor which is kind of transformer-y, and armor-y. But, it's border costume for me. 

Korto: What...the...fuck. At least she realizes it isn't good. But, seriously, she started out so modern with bright orange lines and complicated curves, and then she ended up with an elementary thanksgiving pageant apron like thing. It's...it's fucking awful, and an eyesore.

Elena: Made another color blocked android-esque sci-fi look. Remember how I said Pansear's looked border costume?  This is total costume to me. I think this would be in one of those cheap sci-fi pornographic movies where the costumer had like $40 and one day to make an outfit.  ...  Oh.

Necktat: Stripper at a hot dog stand at an Indian Casino.

Viktor: I like this one too, but I have always had an issue with dresses that look like you just glued things to a base fabric. It's almost cheating. Though, it looks like the cooler version of Justin's showstopper last season, outside the plastic chunky pieces.

Mychael: I'm sorry. I can't be mean to this. Poor guy.  Have at it commenters.

Seth Aaron: What?! At least its not boring?

So, the judging this week is whack again. Seth Aaron who has one of the worst looks on the runway is safe, and Irina, who had the best look, is also safe. But, neither Gabby nor Urie have much interesting to say. I love Gabby's way of looking at clothing, but they didn't have much intelligent to say. Michael Urie compares the boobies on Elena's dress to Rosie from The Jetsons, which...no. She was flat, honey. What were you fantasizing about as a pubescent boy?

But, the most entertaining part of this episode besides Korto's "I don't need to be here" moments, is Necktat's volcano of bullshit. "I never got from this that we were supposed to do something that was wearable. I heard something to the effect of 'flex your creative muscle.' And, this to me was an anime girl, in a sundress, mid-twirl."  AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.  Elena's impression of McKayla Maroney was fucking priceless. I think she did it better than McKayla (sorry!). 

Necktat's volcano of bullshit is only matched by the finale where nobody loses.  WHAT?!  I know people struggled, but there was some serious ugly on this runway, and not even all of the bad looks were out there.  Seth Aaron's look is atrocious. And, just...omg, you guys...what?  *drink*  And, of course, the bullying outfit wins. Heartstrings pulled.

Stray Observations:

- Viktor (I think): "I refuse to do children."

- Viktor's Non-Zinger Zing of the week: "We don't need no twist, thankyouverymuch!...zan-na." *gestures with finger*

- No, Elena, Lady Gaga wasn't around 10 years ago, and no you didn't design for her 10 years ago.

- Zanna (to Irina) "It's definitely the pretty corner over here." Irina: "............" (translated: Don't make me cut you.)

- What the hell does Alyssa Milano have on during the runway?  PLEATS?!!?  I'm about to go on a fashion rage.

- Isaac: "I felt a little manipulated by Pansear's bullying story." Me: "Just like I was manipulated by your martini story."  No, Isaac, you're not gonna live that down until you do some good judging this season.